The One About ACL Fest, Hipster Banjo, and Who You Really Are
Dear West Family
Tomorrow marks the start of weekend 1 of ACL Fest here in Austin. I am not going this year, mainly because it takes something more significant than the very washed up Red Hot Chili Peppers to persuade me to mingle with 20,000 strangers. But, I am sad that I am missing some other artists on a decent line-up, and so if you do go, please make sure to catch Manchester Orchestra, Paramore, The War on Drugs, Arlo Parks, Kasey Musgraves and Marcus Mumford.
Marcus Mumford’s set should be especially interesting as he will be playing music off of his new solo record, which is excellent. I was never much of a Mumford and Sons fan, in the early days of the band anyway. The foot stomping banjo coupled with the hipster barn-hand attire seemed ever so slightly unbelievable to me, given that the band is a group of lads from Wimbledon who went to quite posh schools. But, once they ditched the pseudo Appalachian mountain men vibe and just started playing rock and roll, I really took to them. I listened to their entire set the last time they were at ACL Fest whilst sitting on the hood of my car in the parking lot of Austin High School. I had just preached the Downtown PM service and got to listen to a great band at their best from the comfortable distance of across the river. It is a really sweet memory.
Part of the reason that I have been interested in Mumford’s journey is that Marcus Mumford is a pastor’s kid. As the dad of two pastor’s kids I am always fascinated by the paths taken by clergy offspring. Oftentimes their journeys aren’t pretty as they are exposed to some of the deepest stresses and wounds of a religious community and usually expected to tritely recite the beliefs of their parents even when they are struggling to believe it for themselves. I am delighted that we feel none of this for our kids in our blessed community, but I do guard against it quite closely, striving with all that I have as a dad to remind my kids that church is a community of grace and not a place where they should have to perform or pretend.
I tell you all of this because I was reading an interview with Marcus Mumford not long ago where he spoke about his young life growing up in a church and some of the experiences that shaped him. Some of it wasn’t pretty, and some of it was extremely painful. He said something in that interview that has stuck with me ever since. He said that he became addicted to shame in a community that was supposed to be marked by grace.
Addicted to shame.
I had never heard that phrase before but it has resonated with me deeply. I can get stuck in a rut of shame and self-loathing and then I can convince myself that there is something pious and rewarding about that sort of self-regard (or lack thereof) as if God is pleased when I hate myself and berate myself continually for the things I have done or failed to do. This is beyond the conviction of the Holy Spirit, but is rather more akin to the accusatory cries of God’s enemy, who we know never grows hoarse from hurling those accusations day and night. When I am convicted by the Spirit I am drawn closer to God in sure dependence of the solid standing that the gospel would place beneath my bended-knee. When I am stuck in shame I am driven further from God, failing to believe that such a remarkable thing as grace could exist and to such an extent that it could keep me from falling further.
Addicted to shame. Not sure how to live without it.
All of this was in my mind this week when my reading took me to Colossians 3. In it Paul does something that he does all the time. He calls the Colossians to a higher ethic, to a better way to imitate Christ in their lives, but before he does that, he reminds them of who they are already even before they manage to live that way. He says,
12 Therefore, as God’s chosen ones, holy and dearly loved, -- Colossians 3:12 (CSB)
Paul knows that shame is a terrible motivator for new behavior and he also knows that it is a poor reflection of actual reality for followers of Jesus. Before he gives them this wonderfully new way to live he reminds them that they are chosen by God, holy through Christ, and dearly loved in the heavenlies.
Stop for a sec. If you believe that Jesus died for you and rose from the dead, then you too are …
Chosen …
Holy …
Dearly loved …
I don’t know about you, but I struggle to receive that, mainly because I have become too accustomed to the numbing comfort that shame brings, a numbing that is overridden by the hyper reality of the good news of the gospel. Gospel sobriety requires a detox from years of broken thinking. I am doing all I can to kick the habit.
You know what God thinks about you?
You’re chosen, holy and dearly loved.
The music this week kinda has to be from Marcus Mumford. This song is called Grace, and it is about the grace he has received from his Christian mother in the midst of some very painful revelations.
See you Sunday.
Ross
