Dear West Family

Warning, some quite abstract, extremely verbose, and very nerdy thoughts ahead.

I can sometimes really struggle to be present in the present. Know what I mean? 

It can make me tough to live with, I'm sure. Pray for Sue … again.

My mind tends to wander backwards and forward into past memories and future imaginings that can result in cyclical moods of nostalgia or regret when looking back, and hope or anxiety when looking forward. This can create an uneasy disconnect from reality within me, as I know that my memories of the past get filtered through lenses that shade their true nature, either glorifying or demonizing events and the people who were present in them, and I also know that my visions of future realities and interactions very seldom materialize in any sort of real sense. I can’t tell you how many times I have played every possible scenario out in my head for future conversations and experiences, and they have never turned out even close to that when they have happened. 

All the while, I am all too aware, that the reality of the world and my experience of it is now, in front of me, making up the substance of my life through a series of present tense happenings, or as Annie Dillard famously and rightly said, “How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives. What we do with this hour, and that one, is what we are doing.”  Said another way, our life is the net result of billions of “nows” where we have the opportunity to be present to reality, and we also have temptation to escape it by looking longingly, or loathingly, either forward or back.

All of this was spinning in my head the other day as I was escaping present reality in the comfort of a book about the history of thought by French philosopher, Luc Ferry. He speaks of this exact tension as a major differing point between Christianity and the widely held Greek Stoic view that was prevalent in thought before the idea of the resurrection “ruined” everything (his thoughts, and clearly not mine.) He said that for the Stoic, the greatest ills of society, which led to almost all maladies of mind and soul, were the dual threats of nostalgia and anxiety, or of regret and hope (hope was referred to as the greatest of misfortunes.) The answer, according to the Stoic worldview, was that a good life could only be found by living an existence that was stripped of all hopes and fears, through being attentive only to the present. 

This got me thinking about Philippians 3 and Paul’s approach to a life that can be free of anxiety in the present without having to dull or deny the real influence of the past and the future. Look at what he says in one of my favorite passages in all of Scripture..

7 But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. 8 Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ 9 and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith— 10 that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, 11 that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead. 12 Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. 13 Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. 15 Let those of us who are mature think this way, and if in anything you think otherwise, God will reveal that also to you. 16 Only let us hold true to what we have attained. 

- Php 3:7–16 (ESV)

Paul can look at the past without it defining him. His best moments are worth nothing really, well at least compared to the worth of knowing Christ and being justified in Him. His worst moments can’t define him either, because he doesn’t rely on a righteousness of his own, and so he can look plainly even at his worst seasons and instances and not give in to hopeless regret and despair. Can you imagine how many times Paul would have been tempted to replay the execution of Stephen? But he doesn’t stay there because he knows that what ultimately defines him is Christ’s obedience and not his own disobedience. Oh what a freeing way to view the past. You don’t have to hype it up or relive it in agony.

But Paul also has a new way of viewing the future. The ultimate view of his future is the prize that awaits him with his upward call of God in Christ Jesus. There are many things that could have caused Paul significant anxiety or illegitimate hope when looking forward in his life, but none of them stood close to the ultimate reality of a heavenly call to God. 

So how did this help Paul to be more present in the present? Well, It freed him to live with a posture that has been so helpful to me when I am tempted to look too far ahead or behind in the midst of the pressures of the realities of now. It is in verse 14 and is one my favorite phrases (or terms as it exists in the Greek) of Scripture. 

I PRESS ON.

It means to strive energetically and attentively towards a goal. It means facing the reality of the present with all of its obstacles and opportunities and moving forward in the midst of it all. It isn’t a fanciful longing for a future, or a defeated or denialist recollection of the past, but a non-anxious commitment in the present to move forward towards a reality that is sure. It’s hope, not as a vice - as the Stoics would claim - but as the realest of virtues. Not as a denial of current reality but as the ultimate reality through which we can understand our present.

So dear friends, that was long and self-indulgent, but it has been helping this distracted struggler to stay faithful this week.

Your past doesn’t define you … so press on.
Your ultimate future is secure … so press on.
You can face your present, with full attention and hope … so press on.

One last thing. The song this week is from Jon Foreman again. I love it as it describes Sue and I almost perfectly, but also because it contains that Annie Dillard quote we discussed earlier. Enjoy.

Side By Side (Live At Melody League Studios, San Diego, CA/2020)

See you Sunday.
Press on.

Ross